1 00:00:14,598 --> 00:00:16,767 Hey. Have you ever gotten a mani-pedi? 2 00:00:17,476 --> 00:00:19,436 Uh I've gotten a manicure. 3 00:00:19,561 --> 00:00:22,689 - Really? - Uh, but I've never got a pedicure. 4 00:00:22,814 --> 00:00:25,025 The toes rank second on the body 5 00:00:25,150 --> 00:00:27,778 only to the testicles in terms of how repulsive they are. 6 00:00:27,903 --> 00:00:30,739 - Hey. You know Hobe Turner? - He was a writer on Seinfeld. 7 00:00:30,864 --> 00:00:33,659 - Yeah. Of course. Yeah. - Okay. Doing a movie 8 00:00:33,784 --> 00:00:36,411 starring Jon Hamm, and Jon Hamm 9 00:00:36,537 --> 00:00:39,665 is playing a Larry David-type writer. 10 00:00:39,790 --> 00:00:43,252 They're going against type, and he wants to, uh, 11 00:00:43,377 --> 00:00:45,587 follow you around, spend a day with you. 12 00:00:45,712 --> 00:00:47,172 Yeah, let's do it. 13 00:00:47,297 --> 00:00:48,715 I'm gonna try and make it happen for tomorrow. 14 00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:50,217 - That'll be fun. - Yeah, it will be fun. 15 00:00:50,342 --> 00:00:51,260 [Susie] We're back! 16 00:00:51,385 --> 00:00:52,594 All right, listen. 17 00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:55,055 We are not getting along at all. 18 00:00:55,180 --> 00:00:56,890 Susie and I are at odds. 19 00:00:57,015 --> 00:00:58,392 Oh, my God. I, I don't even know-- 20 00:00:58,517 --> 00:00:59,810 - [Susie] Saw your car! - Hi! 21 00:00:59,935 --> 00:01:01,478 - Hi, ladies. Hi. - Oh. 22 00:01:01,603 --> 00:01:03,146 - Well, well, well. - Hi. 23 00:01:03,272 --> 00:01:04,523 - Hey, look who's here? - Hey. 24 00:01:04,648 --> 00:01:06,691 - I'm glad you're here. - Are you? 25 00:01:06,816 --> 00:01:09,194 I never thought I'd hear those words come out of your mouth. 26 00:01:09,319 --> 00:01:11,363 Okay. So, Becky, my sister... 27 00:01:11,488 --> 00:01:13,322 - [Larry] Uh-huh. - ...is selling that house we bought her. 28 00:01:13,447 --> 00:01:16,075 - Really? - And what's really interesting is, 29 00:01:16,200 --> 00:01:17,244 it's appreciated, 30 00:01:17,369 --> 00:01:18,620 because that section of town is, like-- 31 00:01:18,745 --> 00:01:21,123 Fantastic! Make a little dough! 32 00:01:21,248 --> 00:01:22,499 Becky's gonna make some money. 33 00:01:22,624 --> 00:01:24,751 What do you mean she'll make some money? 34 00:01:24,876 --> 00:01:26,420 I bought the house. 35 00:01:26,545 --> 00:01:28,297 - We bought the house. - [Larry] Okay, yeah, okay. 36 00:01:28,422 --> 00:01:29,923 - And we gave it... - [Larry] We bought the house. 37 00:01:30,048 --> 00:01:31,174 - ...as a gift. - Okay. 38 00:01:31,300 --> 00:01:32,759 A gift-- It wasn't a gift 39 00:01:32,884 --> 00:01:34,636 for her to sell and make money. 40 00:01:34,761 --> 00:01:36,179 It was a gift for her to live in. 41 00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:38,265 - You gave it to her. It was a gift. - [Cheryl] Yeah. You-- 42 00:01:38,390 --> 00:01:39,891 I didn't give her the house so she could sell it. 43 00:01:40,017 --> 00:01:41,351 What if she sold it in three days? 44 00:01:41,476 --> 00:01:43,186 Would she be allowed to keep the money? 45 00:01:43,312 --> 00:01:45,230 - She's flipping houses now? - She's been there for 15 years. 46 00:01:45,355 --> 00:01:46,940 That's not exactly a flip. 47 00:01:47,065 --> 00:01:49,568 So she's gonna sell it and make this tremendous profit? 48 00:01:49,693 --> 00:01:52,070 - And get everything? - That's, that's crazy talk. 49 00:01:52,195 --> 00:01:53,780 - [Larry] That's insane. - Why are you siding with him? 50 00:01:53,905 --> 00:01:55,490 - What do you mean, why am I siding with him? - No! 51 00:01:55,616 --> 00:01:56,575 [Jeff] That's the right thing! 52 00:01:56,700 --> 00:01:58,535 Listen, I don't wanna be 53 00:01:58,660 --> 00:01:59,661 in the middle of this. 54 00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:01,330 I don't really talk to Becky. 55 00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:02,456 Why? 56 00:02:02,581 --> 00:02:04,458 We've grown apart through the years. 57 00:02:04,583 --> 00:02:06,543 She calls me Queen Elizabeth. 58 00:02:06,668 --> 00:02:08,544 She calls herself Princess Margaret-- 59 00:02:08,669 --> 00:02:10,339 - Queen Elizabeth? - Yeah. 60 00:02:10,464 --> 00:02:11,882 Oh, yeah. 'Cause you got everything. 61 00:02:12,007 --> 00:02:14,885 - That's what she says. - And she's jealous. 62 00:02:15,010 --> 00:02:16,428 So if you're comfortable... 63 00:02:16,803 --> 00:02:19,014 going to her and asking her for money-- -Oh, you better believe it. 64 00:02:19,139 --> 00:02:21,183 Oh, you better believe it. I feel comfortable. 65 00:02:21,308 --> 00:02:22,768 All right, well, you do it, because Cheryl doesn't feel comfortable. 66 00:02:22,893 --> 00:02:24,853 - Is that a character? - [Larry] Yeah. Kramer. 67 00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:26,063 - [Jeff] Oh. - Oh, I feel comfortable. 68 00:02:26,188 --> 00:02:28,815 - [Cheryl] Okay. - Oh, you better believe it. 69 00:02:30,317 --> 00:02:33,737 This Hobe Turner movie is, like, one of the-- is a big thing for me. 70 00:02:33,862 --> 00:02:35,906 - Yeah. - And I'm excited to do it. And, you know, 71 00:02:36,031 --> 00:02:37,324 the guy is kind of based on you. 72 00:02:37,449 --> 00:02:40,410 So the best way I can figure it is to just hang out. 73 00:02:40,535 --> 00:02:43,080 - You know. I ask-- - It's not gonna be easy, Jon. 74 00:02:43,205 --> 00:02:44,456 I'm a very complex man. 75 00:02:44,581 --> 00:02:46,416 - Very complicated. - I get it. 76 00:02:46,541 --> 00:02:48,293 But I just wanna say I'd really appreciate it. 77 00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:50,212 - You'd appreciate it. - Yes, I would. 78 00:02:50,337 --> 00:02:54,132 Really. This-- this word "appreciate," it's very, very odd. 79 00:02:54,257 --> 00:02:56,385 People seem to think that if they use the word "appreciate," 80 00:02:56,510 --> 00:02:58,387 all of a sudden, the seas part for them. 81 00:02:58,512 --> 00:03:01,264 "Oh, hey, I'm so sorry that I... 82 00:03:01,389 --> 00:03:02,974 "I robbed your house and burned it down. 83 00:03:03,100 --> 00:03:05,143 I'd really appreciate it if you wouldn't tell the cops." 84 00:03:05,268 --> 00:03:08,980 - You know? - This is exactly what I'm talking about. 85 00:03:09,606 --> 00:03:13,110 - This is perfect. - All right. Let's order the main course. 86 00:03:13,235 --> 00:03:14,611 Yes, we should. 87 00:03:14,986 --> 00:03:16,988 - There's so many things on this. - I can't look at these menus. 88 00:03:17,114 --> 00:03:19,574 There's so much. Oh, you know what? 89 00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:22,786 We should just ask them. They got-- They know what they're doing. 90 00:03:22,911 --> 00:03:23,829 Ho-bo-bo. Ho-ho-ho-ho. 91 00:03:23,954 --> 00:03:25,663 Why are you-- Why are you doing this? 92 00:03:25,788 --> 00:03:29,418 Excuse me. What, uh-- What'd you guys get? 93 00:03:29,543 --> 00:03:31,044 Why do you want to know? 94 00:03:31,169 --> 00:03:32,587 Because we're about to order. 95 00:03:32,713 --> 00:03:34,715 But, uh, you have a menu. 96 00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:36,466 Yeah, but I figured, you know, 97 00:03:36,591 --> 00:03:38,927 you're the experts, why not copy you. 98 00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:41,304 Why would you think we're the experts? 99 00:03:41,430 --> 00:03:43,014 Chinese. 100 00:03:43,140 --> 00:03:45,892 - Ai-yah! - That doesn't make us an expert on food. 101 00:03:46,017 --> 00:03:47,102 Yeah. Yeah, I think it does. 102 00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:48,770 I mean, if there was a table of fat people, 103 00:03:48,895 --> 00:03:50,480 and a table of skinny people, 104 00:03:50,605 --> 00:03:52,232 I'd ask the fat people what they were getting. 105 00:03:52,566 --> 00:03:55,318 'Cause they're a little more expert at eating than the skinny people. 106 00:03:55,444 --> 00:03:56,653 Anyway... 107 00:03:56,778 --> 00:03:59,531 - Return to your meal. - Thank you. 108 00:04:01,658 --> 00:04:04,244 - What? - This is gold. 109 00:04:07,122 --> 00:04:08,248 - Schmo-hawk. - Yeah, schmo-hawk. 110 00:04:08,373 --> 00:04:09,583 - I thought I heard that. - Yeah. 111 00:04:09,708 --> 00:04:11,168 But I wasn't sure I heard it right. 112 00:04:11,293 --> 00:04:12,586 - S-C-H? - S-C-H. 113 00:04:12,711 --> 00:04:13,920 You know, you got the "schmo." 114 00:04:14,045 --> 00:04:16,089 It's a schmo. Yeah. 115 00:04:17,048 --> 00:04:19,301 It's the browsing, right? You can't stand it. 116 00:04:19,426 --> 00:04:20,552 - You hate it. - No browsing. 117 00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:22,303 - No browsing. Yeah. - No browsing. 118 00:04:22,428 --> 00:04:25,432 - You own this stand? - No. I work for the owner. 119 00:04:25,557 --> 00:04:28,185 What do you do if you have to go to the bathroom? 120 00:04:28,310 --> 00:04:29,311 I don't go. 121 00:04:30,312 --> 00:04:31,646 You don't go. 122 00:04:31,772 --> 00:04:33,231 The whole shift, you don't go? 123 00:04:33,356 --> 00:04:35,567 I can't go. I have to watch. 124 00:04:35,692 --> 00:04:36,860 All right. You know what? 125 00:04:36,985 --> 00:04:38,945 Do you have to go to the bathroom now? 126 00:04:40,238 --> 00:04:41,948 - Go. I'll watch it. - You'll watch it? 127 00:04:42,073 --> 00:04:44,201 - I'll watch the stand. Go. - Okay. Put this on. 128 00:04:44,326 --> 00:04:45,994 - Yeah. Yeah, yeah. - Thank you. Thank you so-- 129 00:04:46,119 --> 00:04:47,621 Yeah. You're, you're, you're welcome. 130 00:04:47,746 --> 00:04:48,747 I really have to go. 131 00:04:48,872 --> 00:04:50,081 - No browsing, okay? - No browsing. 132 00:04:50,207 --> 00:04:51,916 - You browse, you buy. - You browse, you buy. 133 00:04:52,041 --> 00:04:54,711 - Thank you. - Take your time. Take your time. 134 00:04:54,836 --> 00:04:56,755 Get your papers here. Papers! 135 00:04:56,880 --> 00:04:58,839 Magazines. Newspapers! 136 00:05:00,008 --> 00:05:01,218 Sir. 137 00:05:01,343 --> 00:05:02,677 - Oh. - Sir. 138 00:05:02,803 --> 00:05:04,971 - Sorry, no browsing. - I'm not browsing. 139 00:05:05,096 --> 00:05:08,767 The rule here is, you buy, then browse. 140 00:05:08,892 --> 00:05:10,644 I browse to buy. 141 00:05:10,769 --> 00:05:12,312 I know, but that's-- I'm sorry. 142 00:05:12,437 --> 00:05:13,939 That's, that's just not gonna work. 143 00:05:14,064 --> 00:05:15,232 What the fuck? 144 00:05:15,357 --> 00:05:16,983 - Hey! - Hey. 145 00:05:17,108 --> 00:05:18,568 Yeah, sorry. Yeah. 146 00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:21,654 LD what the-- What are you, nuts? 147 00:05:21,779 --> 00:05:23,448 - No. - Are you having a breakdown? 148 00:05:23,573 --> 00:05:25,200 - [Richard] Hey, Jon. - Hey, how are you? 149 00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:26,868 - Jon Hamm. - Yeah, it's nice to meet you. Big fan. 150 00:05:26,993 --> 00:05:28,577 What is-- What the f-- What, are you guys... 151 00:05:28,702 --> 00:05:30,205 - ...escaped from a mental institution? - No. 152 00:05:30,539 --> 00:05:31,790 The guy had to go to the bathroom, so I took over. 153 00:05:32,374 --> 00:05:33,625 So get this-- -What, what are you guys doing? 154 00:05:33,750 --> 00:05:35,418 Jon's starring in a movie. 155 00:05:35,544 --> 00:05:37,420 - Well, what else is new? - And the character... 156 00:05:37,546 --> 00:05:39,047 The character's based on me. 157 00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:40,924 So he's kind of shadowing me. 158 00:05:41,049 --> 00:05:42,717 What's the name of the movie? The Biggest Asshole... 159 00:05:42,843 --> 00:05:44,594 - ... That Ever Roamed the Earth? - [Larry] Oh, I like that. 160 00:05:44,719 --> 00:05:46,303 Yeah, that's, that's good. 161 00:05:46,428 --> 00:05:48,223 - I'll tell Hobe. - That's good. 162 00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:51,309 You're a great actor, but this could be the end. 163 00:05:51,434 --> 00:05:52,601 So what are you doing? 164 00:05:52,726 --> 00:05:54,145 You know Michelle, the CEO... 165 00:05:54,271 --> 00:05:55,939 - ...I'm dating? - Yeah, I know she's a CEO. 166 00:05:56,064 --> 00:05:58,440 Well, I gotta go furniture shopping with her today. 167 00:05:58,567 --> 00:06:00,277 Furniture shopping? 168 00:06:00,402 --> 00:06:01,486 Yeah, but I gotta really get going. 169 00:06:01,611 --> 00:06:03,196 - [Larry] Okay. - Why don't we have a meal? 170 00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:04,865 We haven't had dinner in a while. 171 00:06:04,990 --> 00:06:06,283 Yeah, let's do it. Let's have dinner. 172 00:06:06,408 --> 00:06:08,493 - Can, uh, Michelle come? - No. 173 00:06:08,618 --> 00:06:10,704 Listen, I-- I really want her to come. I-- 174 00:06:10,829 --> 00:06:12,247 I really would appreciate it. 175 00:06:12,372 --> 00:06:14,541 See? See what I'm saying with the "appreciate"? 176 00:06:14,666 --> 00:06:16,626 - I'm finally starting to get it. I see what you're saying. Yes. - Huh? You see it? 177 00:06:16,751 --> 00:06:18,044 [Richard] What are you talking about? 178 00:06:18,169 --> 00:06:20,714 I don't succumb to "appreciate." 179 00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:23,049 I'm not gonna bring her. For you, okay? 180 00:06:23,174 --> 00:06:24,718 - [Larry] Yeah. - To honor our friendship. 181 00:06:24,843 --> 00:06:26,845 - But she's gonna give me shit for it. - [Larry] So what? 182 00:06:26,970 --> 00:06:28,638 You're gonna pay down the line for this. 183 00:06:28,763 --> 00:06:31,391 - You text me where you want to meet, asshole. - Okay. 184 00:06:33,935 --> 00:06:36,229 Thank you. Thank you so much. 185 00:06:36,354 --> 00:06:37,272 - Oh, sure. - That was quick. 186 00:06:37,606 --> 00:06:39,774 - I feel so much better. - I'm sure you do. 187 00:06:39,900 --> 00:06:41,401 - Get this off me. - Okay. 188 00:06:41,526 --> 00:06:43,820 - What do I owe you? - You owe me nothing. 189 00:06:43,945 --> 00:06:46,698 - Nothing. Oh, boy. - [Larry] No. I insist. 190 00:06:46,823 --> 00:06:49,951 - Yeah. - Thank you. That piss was worth $10, easy. 191 00:06:50,076 --> 00:06:52,704 Well, see ya, man. I mean, look what you did. 192 00:06:52,829 --> 00:06:54,414 Yeah. 193 00:06:54,539 --> 00:06:56,458 A $10 piss. 194 00:06:58,251 --> 00:07:01,630 - Mm. Mm. - And he offered me $10 to take a piss. 195 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:04,049 - Wow. - And I'm thinking... 196 00:07:04,174 --> 00:07:06,176 what a great idea for a business. 197 00:07:06,301 --> 00:07:08,887 You relieve people who have jobs 198 00:07:09,012 --> 00:07:10,805 where they can't use a bathroom. 199 00:07:10,931 --> 00:07:13,642 Toll booth collectors, shoe shine stands, 200 00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:15,018 parking garage attendants. 201 00:07:15,143 --> 00:07:17,562 They contact you on your phone, it's an app, 202 00:07:17,687 --> 00:07:20,398 and then you go down and man the store, 203 00:07:20,523 --> 00:07:21,942 when they go to the bathroom. 204 00:07:22,067 --> 00:07:23,234 Do you know how many times I've peed 205 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:24,694 in a fuckin' Gatorade bottle 206 00:07:24,819 --> 00:07:26,446 when I couldn't find a fuckin' bathroom? 207 00:07:26,571 --> 00:07:27,989 Plenty of fuckin' times. 208 00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:28,990 Mm-hmm. 209 00:07:29,115 --> 00:07:30,617 And know how many times I forgot 210 00:07:30,742 --> 00:07:32,327 I peed in that Gatorade bottle 211 00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:34,412 and drank that shit? Once. 212 00:07:35,205 --> 00:07:36,414 That's a fuckin' good idea. 213 00:07:36,539 --> 00:07:37,666 Thanks for sharing that story. 214 00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:39,209 This could be the pee Amazon. 215 00:07:39,334 --> 00:07:41,252 - You know? This, this is big. - This could be big. 216 00:07:41,378 --> 00:07:42,629 - This could be very big. - Every fuckin' where. 217 00:07:42,754 --> 00:07:44,005 - Yeah. - Very big. We need a name. 218 00:07:44,130 --> 00:07:45,674 - Poober. - Poober! 219 00:07:45,799 --> 00:07:48,009 - Meh. It's too close to Uber. - Meh. 220 00:07:48,134 --> 00:07:49,469 I got something. 221 00:07:49,594 --> 00:07:50,929 "Gotta Go." 222 00:07:51,221 --> 00:07:53,139 - Like that. That's catchy as hell. - You like that? 223 00:08:09,447 --> 00:08:12,242 - Oh. Hey! - Hey, Becky. 224 00:08:12,367 --> 00:08:14,369 Can I talk to you for a minute? 225 00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:17,330 Yeah. Okay. Come on. 226 00:08:18,081 --> 00:08:19,624 [Larry scoffs] Wow. 227 00:08:19,749 --> 00:08:21,626 What, did you have a party in here? 228 00:08:21,751 --> 00:08:24,087 Nope. Nope. Just me. 229 00:08:24,212 --> 00:08:25,922 Can I make you something to drink? 230 00:08:26,631 --> 00:08:28,258 Uh, no, thanks. 231 00:08:28,383 --> 00:08:29,884 Okay. 232 00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:32,511 You know, you're trying to sell a house. 233 00:08:32,636 --> 00:08:33,763 - It's-- - Oh. 234 00:08:34,139 --> 00:08:36,057 It's gonna be hard to sell a house like, like this. 235 00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:37,559 I gotta tidy up a bit, I know. 236 00:08:37,684 --> 00:08:40,270 You know, it's all based on first impressions. 237 00:08:40,395 --> 00:08:42,605 - People come over, they're gonna see this... - Yeah. 238 00:08:42,731 --> 00:08:43,940 ...and then no one's gonna buy it. 239 00:08:44,065 --> 00:08:45,942 All right. I'll take care of it, Dad. 240 00:08:46,067 --> 00:08:47,944 - Oh. Yeah. - Hey. 241 00:08:48,069 --> 00:08:50,864 Heard about the whole Cheryl-Ted blowup in Mexico. 242 00:08:50,989 --> 00:08:52,699 Oh. -Oh, boy. 243 00:08:52,824 --> 00:08:54,951 - Little bit of ash. Sorry. - Yeah, that was... 244 00:08:55,076 --> 00:08:57,037 - That was wild. - Yeah, that made me happy. 245 00:08:57,162 --> 00:08:59,164 - Oh, you-- Really? - Little Miss Perfect. Yeah. 246 00:08:59,289 --> 00:09:00,790 It made me feel better about myself. 247 00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:03,501 Boy, you two used to get along so well. 248 00:09:03,626 --> 00:09:05,503 Yeah, well, not anymore. 249 00:09:05,628 --> 00:09:07,797 You sure I can't get you something to drink? 250 00:09:07,922 --> 00:09:09,799 No. What are you drinking in the daytime for? 251 00:09:09,924 --> 00:09:12,260 - Who drinks in the daytime? - People who go to brunch. 252 00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:13,761 Well, we're not at brunch. 253 00:09:13,886 --> 00:09:15,679 Okay. So I am not having a mimosa. 254 00:09:16,306 --> 00:09:19,142 - All right. - What, what, what do you-- What do you want? 255 00:09:19,267 --> 00:09:20,852 - What, what's going on? - Okay. Well, 256 00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:22,812 obviously, I heard you're selling the house. 257 00:09:22,937 --> 00:09:24,439 Yeah. 258 00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:26,649 You know, the thing is, Becky, 259 00:09:26,775 --> 00:09:29,652 you know, I did buy you the house, so... 260 00:09:29,778 --> 00:09:31,738 - I know. - It's kind of my house. 261 00:09:31,863 --> 00:09:34,657 - No. No, you-- - I paid for the house. 262 00:09:34,783 --> 00:09:38,035 And I thought it was only fair and reasonable-- -Okay. 263 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:40,914 I'm gonna let you keep the profits 264 00:09:41,039 --> 00:09:42,624 to, to the house. 265 00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:45,460 But of course, I'll get my investment back. 266 00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:48,379 No, no, no. No. 267 00:09:48,755 --> 00:09:52,509 Hey. Say I gave you $700,000-- -It's my house. 268 00:09:53,843 --> 00:09:56,261 Please don't do this to me, okay? 269 00:09:56,386 --> 00:09:58,306 Please don't do this. This is my house. 270 00:09:58,431 --> 00:09:59,808 It's all I have left. 271 00:09:59,933 --> 00:10:03,686 Oh, my God. Please don't do this to me. 272 00:10:03,812 --> 00:10:05,897 I, I lost my job. 273 00:10:06,022 --> 00:10:07,565 And my boyfriend broke up with me. 274 00:10:07,690 --> 00:10:09,526 - Geez. Don't cry-- - He was from Poland, 275 00:10:09,651 --> 00:10:12,987 and it turns out all he wanted was a visa. 276 00:10:13,113 --> 00:10:15,782 Okay, you... 277 00:10:15,907 --> 00:10:18,827 Forget, forget it. You, you, you can keep the house. 278 00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:20,995 You can keep all the money, keep, keep the profits. 279 00:10:21,121 --> 00:10:23,164 Keep, keep it all. 280 00:10:23,289 --> 00:10:26,417 - Is this a joke? - No. No. No. 281 00:10:26,543 --> 00:10:27,961 - You mean it? - Keep it all. 282 00:10:28,086 --> 00:10:30,755 - Thank you, Larry. - Keep it. You can have it. 283 00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:32,966 Yeah. It's okay. 284 00:10:40,014 --> 00:10:41,015 - Really? - Yeah. 285 00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:42,809 - Wow. - I know. 286 00:10:42,934 --> 00:10:44,977 I think I always had a secret little crush on her. 287 00:10:45,102 --> 00:10:46,437 - Me too. - Yeah. 288 00:10:46,563 --> 00:10:48,148 It was in the daytime. 289 00:10:48,273 --> 00:10:50,107 I love daytime sex. 290 00:10:50,232 --> 00:10:51,776 You're filled with energy. 291 00:10:51,901 --> 00:10:54,195 - Yes! I mean, nighttime, you're so close to going to bed. - Filled! 292 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:56,197 - Right! - Why are you doing that before you go to bed? 293 00:10:56,322 --> 00:10:58,032 - The whole thing should be all flipped around. - I know. 294 00:10:58,158 --> 00:10:59,534 - It should never happen at night. - The daytime. 295 00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:00,952 - Always during the day. - Yes. 296 00:11:01,077 --> 00:11:02,370 Ah. It's Jon. 297 00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:04,497 - What's going on? - Nothing. We're just going out to dinner. 298 00:11:04,622 --> 00:11:07,208 - Is that working out okay? - Yeah. Yeah. 299 00:11:07,333 --> 00:11:09,085 [Cheryl] Where is he? 300 00:11:11,254 --> 00:11:14,424 Did you have sex with my sister Becky? 301 00:11:14,549 --> 00:11:15,884 Who said that? 302 00:11:16,634 --> 00:11:17,760 Becky! 303 00:11:17,886 --> 00:11:19,053 What did she say? 304 00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:21,306 She said, "Guess who I fucked?" 305 00:11:21,431 --> 00:11:23,892 - Huh... - Oh, my God. 306 00:11:24,017 --> 00:11:26,769 - He did. - Oh, my God! 307 00:11:26,895 --> 00:11:28,688 - What, what are you thinking? - I was there, 308 00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:32,357 and she was, she-she was upset, she was sobbing, 309 00:11:32,482 --> 00:11:34,402 and I consoled her, and... 310 00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:36,237 And, you know, it just, it happened. 311 00:11:36,362 --> 00:11:37,989 - [Larry] That's why. - Yeah, what about the money? 312 00:11:38,114 --> 00:11:39,324 I told her, uh, 313 00:11:39,449 --> 00:11:41,159 she didn't have to, uh, share the money with me. 314 00:11:41,284 --> 00:11:43,535 - Oh, my God. - That's, that's like prostitution. 315 00:11:43,660 --> 00:11:46,080 - It was consensual sex between two adults! - Oh, my God. 316 00:11:46,206 --> 00:11:48,917 - There's nothing wrong with that, as far as I know! - [Susie] She was vulnerable. 317 00:11:49,042 --> 00:11:51,044 We were all in the living room over there 318 00:11:51,169 --> 00:11:52,503 when you gave a big speech, 319 00:11:52,629 --> 00:11:54,380 and you were gonna march over there 320 00:11:54,505 --> 00:11:56,341 - and get your money back for that house. - I did march over there, 321 00:11:56,466 --> 00:11:57,800 and then I felt sorry for her. 322 00:11:57,926 --> 00:11:59,260 - Oh, my-- - Yeah, you marched over there, 323 00:11:59,385 --> 00:12:00,636 you got a fuckin' blow job, 324 00:12:00,761 --> 00:12:02,096 and then you gave the house away. 325 00:12:02,513 --> 00:12:04,390 There's a million fuckin' women in the world. 326 00:12:04,515 --> 00:12:07,352 - You have to have sex with Cheryl's sister? - What? 327 00:12:07,477 --> 00:12:08,937 Oh. Hey, Jonny. 328 00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:10,521 Uh, yeah. The door was ajar. 329 00:12:10,647 --> 00:12:11,898 The fuck are you doing in my house? 330 00:12:12,023 --> 00:12:13,399 What is Jon Hamm doing in my house? 331 00:12:13,942 --> 00:12:15,360 - He's, he's, um... - Hold on. Yeah, I should get this down. 332 00:12:15,485 --> 00:12:16,569 He's starring in a movie, 333 00:12:16,945 --> 00:12:18,279 and he's kind of, you know, shadowing me. 334 00:12:18,404 --> 00:12:19,697 He's bas-- The character's based on me. 335 00:12:19,822 --> 00:12:22,325 So, the character is a disgusting pervert? 336 00:12:22,450 --> 00:12:24,160 That's good. 337 00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:26,120 It's actually not funny Jon Hamm. 338 00:12:26,246 --> 00:12:27,956 Oh, no, no. I'm not here. Act like I'm not here. 339 00:12:28,081 --> 00:12:29,999 I'm just a fly on the wall. Just, uh-- -Larry: Hey. 340 00:12:30,124 --> 00:12:31,292 - New sneaks? - Oh, yeah. 341 00:12:31,417 --> 00:12:32,961 - Good, right? How comfortable? - Love 'em. 342 00:12:33,336 --> 00:12:35,463 - Yeah. - [Cheryl] Hey, guys? This is not the time, okay? 343 00:12:35,588 --> 00:12:37,090 It's my house, you're in my house. 344 00:12:37,215 --> 00:12:38,841 - [Jon] I'm terribly sorry. - You crossed a line... 345 00:12:38,967 --> 00:12:40,426 - ...this time. - You crossed a line! 346 00:12:40,551 --> 00:12:42,011 - Oh, my God. - [Larry] I didn't cross a line. 347 00:12:42,136 --> 00:12:44,347 I went over the line that you already crossed. 348 00:12:44,472 --> 00:12:45,473 - What? - [Larry] He's a friend. 349 00:12:45,598 --> 00:12:47,767 Oh, oh, oh, I'm sorry. Ted and Larry, 350 00:12:47,892 --> 00:12:50,352 it's just like you and your sister. It's the same thing. 351 00:12:50,477 --> 00:12:52,855 - It's nowhere close. - It is not close. 352 00:12:52,981 --> 00:12:55,775 It is close! She slept with my friend, Ted Danson. 353 00:12:55,900 --> 00:12:58,027 - Okay? - [Larry] Okay. That's fine. 354 00:12:58,152 --> 00:13:00,154 - But I can't sleep with her sister? - It feels like the same thing. 355 00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:03,283 - Because Ted is like a sister to Larry. - [Larry] Yeah! 356 00:13:03,408 --> 00:13:05,368 No. It's a relationship with Ted. 357 00:13:05,493 --> 00:13:07,287 It's not, I didn't just go have s-- -Larry: Oh, it's a relationship? 358 00:13:07,412 --> 00:13:09,080 Who's to say that I'm not gonna have a relationship 359 00:13:09,205 --> 00:13:10,415 - with Becky, what do you mean? - [Cheryl] Oh, my God. 360 00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:13,042 [Susie] You know how jealous Becky is of Cheryl. 361 00:13:13,167 --> 00:13:16,629 You know that Becky thinks of herself as Princess Margaret, 362 00:13:16,754 --> 00:13:18,589 and that Cheryl is Queen Elizabeth. 363 00:13:18,715 --> 00:13:20,800 - Yeah. Right. - Yeah. Oh, and you think you're Prince Philip? 364 00:13:20,925 --> 00:13:22,218 Is that what you're saying? 365 00:13:22,343 --> 00:13:23,845 - Yeah. - [Cheryl] Oh, my God. 366 00:13:23,970 --> 00:13:26,556 Prince Philip would put a fucking gun to his head 367 00:13:26,681 --> 00:13:28,766 before he had you representing him. 368 00:13:28,891 --> 00:13:31,059 Again, real quick, are we talking about The Crown now? 369 00:13:31,184 --> 00:13:32,477 - Yeah. - How good is that show? 370 00:13:32,602 --> 00:13:34,814 You know what, Jon Hamm, it was nice meeting you. 371 00:13:34,939 --> 00:13:36,566 But, really, this is between us. 372 00:13:37,066 --> 00:13:39,277 You know what, I've heard enough. Come on, Jonny. Let's go eat. 373 00:13:39,402 --> 00:13:40,987 - I'll call you. - You've had enough... 374 00:13:41,404 --> 00:13:42,488 - ...you petty piece of shit. - Thank you so much, by the way. 375 00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:44,490 [Susie] Yeah, it's great. It's great. 376 00:13:44,615 --> 00:13:47,076 - Go, go be him, asshole. - Thank you. 377 00:13:51,205 --> 00:13:53,166 - Aw, man. - [Larry] What are you doing? 378 00:13:53,291 --> 00:13:56,461 You just plopped that into your, into your water? 379 00:13:56,586 --> 00:13:59,047 Yeah, I plopped it in because I like lime with my water. 380 00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:01,799 I know but they, they don't wash these rinds. 381 00:14:01,924 --> 00:14:03,343 You gotta have some trust in people. 382 00:14:03,468 --> 00:14:06,011 You ever see signs in bathrooms, "Wash before leaving"? 383 00:14:06,136 --> 00:14:07,764 It doesn't matter if their hands are clean. 384 00:14:07,889 --> 00:14:09,349 - [Richard] They don't have to-- - The rind's dirty. 385 00:14:09,474 --> 00:14:12,101 - You get a disease. - Aah, please. 386 00:14:12,226 --> 00:14:13,561 It's bullshit. 387 00:14:13,686 --> 00:14:16,064 And I'm really irked about something, man. 388 00:14:16,189 --> 00:14:17,315 Did you say "irked"? 389 00:14:18,066 --> 00:14:20,360 - Yeah, irked. - I never heard you use that word before, but go ahead. 390 00:14:20,485 --> 00:14:23,571 I'm irked because-- with all due respect-- 391 00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:25,156 Jon is here, and Michelle is-- 392 00:14:25,281 --> 00:14:27,033 You wouldn't let Michelle come to dinner. 393 00:14:27,158 --> 00:14:28,701 I have to watch my P's and Q's. 394 00:14:28,826 --> 00:14:30,495 I don't wanna watch P's and Q's. 395 00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:32,246 Do you wanna watch P's and Q's? 396 00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:33,790 What are you, Shari Lewis? Where's Lamb Chop? 397 00:14:33,915 --> 00:14:35,541 In your pants? 398 00:14:35,666 --> 00:14:39,045 - Look, she's irked. - She's irked. 399 00:14:39,170 --> 00:14:40,713 So you're both irked? 400 00:14:40,838 --> 00:14:44,217 She's so angry at me that I had to, you know, make an excuse. 401 00:14:44,342 --> 00:14:45,385 Oh. What did you say? 402 00:14:45,510 --> 00:14:47,470 I said you had a bleeding rectum, 403 00:14:47,595 --> 00:14:48,971 and that you were worried and scared, 404 00:14:49,097 --> 00:14:50,973 and you needed to talk to me alone, 405 00:14:51,099 --> 00:14:53,059 and you'd be embarrassed if she heard it. 406 00:14:53,184 --> 00:14:55,561 Are you out of your fucking mind? 407 00:14:55,686 --> 00:14:57,480 - Well... - You couldn't think of a better excuse than that? 408 00:14:57,605 --> 00:14:59,357 You should have called me. I got thousands of 'em. 409 00:14:59,482 --> 00:15:01,818 - I can't even face her now. - Why not? 410 00:15:01,943 --> 00:15:03,945 Nobody respects a person with a bleeding rectum. 411 00:15:04,070 --> 00:15:06,114 You think Lincoln could have prosecuted a war 412 00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:07,865 if people knew he had a bleeding rectum? 413 00:15:07,990 --> 00:15:09,784 And by the way, when you come to the dinner party 414 00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:11,702 in a few days, I would not mention it. 415 00:15:11,828 --> 00:15:13,204 Who mentions that at a dinner party? 416 00:15:13,329 --> 00:15:15,998 Do I still have it or-or am I over it? 417 00:15:16,124 --> 00:15:18,042 No, I left it open. 418 00:15:18,167 --> 00:15:19,836 Sorry to hear that. 419 00:15:20,253 --> 00:15:21,838 [Jon] I also-- Can I say, 420 00:15:21,963 --> 00:15:23,464 we ordered this kind of for the table, 421 00:15:23,589 --> 00:15:25,883 and I feel like you've gone way over your 422 00:15:26,008 --> 00:15:27,510 appetizer allotment at this point. 423 00:15:27,635 --> 00:15:29,387 - My allotment? - [Jon] Well, there's three of us. 424 00:15:29,512 --> 00:15:32,557 - We each get a third. - Who makes up that fuckin' rule? 425 00:15:32,682 --> 00:15:34,183 It's an unwritten rule. 426 00:15:34,308 --> 00:15:35,726 Oh, my God. 427 00:15:35,852 --> 00:15:37,395 There's two Larry Davids. 428 00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:39,272 Holy shit. 429 00:15:39,397 --> 00:15:40,565 Pretty good. 430 00:15:40,690 --> 00:15:43,192 Pretty, pretty good. 431 00:15:46,154 --> 00:15:47,738 Aah. 432 00:15:53,202 --> 00:15:56,038 - She threw me out. - She threw you out? 433 00:15:56,164 --> 00:15:57,999 - Yep. Yep, yep, yep, yep. - Why? 434 00:15:58,124 --> 00:16:01,544 Well, she doesn't like the way I defended you being with Becky. 435 00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:04,422 - Come on in. Make yourself at home. - I will. 436 00:16:04,547 --> 00:16:05,840 I, I gotta go. 437 00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:07,425 - Where are you going? - I'm going to Becky's. 438 00:16:07,550 --> 00:16:10,178 Oh. If you keep going to Becky's, 439 00:16:10,303 --> 00:16:12,054 I can't go home. 440 00:16:12,180 --> 00:16:13,473 Keep going to Becky's. 441 00:16:13,598 --> 00:16:15,433 - I'll see you later. - Bedroom's upstairs. 442 00:16:15,558 --> 00:16:17,310 - Second one. - Got it. 443 00:16:17,435 --> 00:16:19,228 Okay. 444 00:16:42,335 --> 00:16:43,169 No. 445 00:16:51,969 --> 00:16:53,221 You're welcome. 446 00:17:03,856 --> 00:17:07,318 We did it. We did it! 447 00:17:09,946 --> 00:17:11,739 You didn't expect an airport drop-off, did you? 448 00:17:12,114 --> 00:17:14,325 - Nope. Nobody expects an airport drop-off anymore. - Ah? Airport drop-off. 449 00:17:14,450 --> 00:17:17,036 - All right, well, have fun skiing. - I will. 450 00:17:17,161 --> 00:17:18,454 I'll text you when I land. 451 00:17:18,579 --> 00:17:19,955 - Eh, not necessary. - I didn't really want to. 452 00:17:20,289 --> 00:17:21,541 - Yeah. - It's like an extra, unnecessary step. 453 00:17:22,124 --> 00:17:24,001 - I'll find out if you're dead. - Yeah, yeah. You'll know. 454 00:17:24,126 --> 00:17:25,795 - Yeah. - You got big plans for when I'm gone? 455 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:27,213 I'm gonna help a friend out 456 00:17:27,338 --> 00:17:29,090 with his, uh, with his new business. 457 00:17:29,215 --> 00:17:30,132 - Cool. - Yeah. 458 00:17:30,258 --> 00:17:32,009 - Thank you. - Bye. 459 00:17:33,469 --> 00:17:36,013 [Leon] He told her you had a bleeding rectum? 460 00:17:36,138 --> 00:17:38,099 Yeah. Now I gotta walk around 461 00:17:38,224 --> 00:17:40,434 knowing this woman thinks I have a bleeding rectum. 462 00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:41,811 I can't live like that. 463 00:17:41,936 --> 00:17:43,145 'Cause once that starts to spread, 464 00:17:43,271 --> 00:17:44,480 she's gonna tell everybody. 465 00:17:44,605 --> 00:17:45,856 And the worst part is, 466 00:17:45,982 --> 00:17:47,942 no one's ever gonna know that the bleeding stopped. 467 00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:50,319 People are thinkin', how does he stop the bleedin'? 468 00:17:50,444 --> 00:17:51,445 Is he wearin' a pad? 469 00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:53,239 Is he, is he a little boy, a little Dutch boy 470 00:17:53,364 --> 00:17:54,699 with his finger in his ass, 471 00:17:54,824 --> 00:17:56,534 with wooden shoes on, with socks to his knee, 472 00:17:56,659 --> 00:17:58,744 little shorts on, little vest, little top hat on, 473 00:17:58,869 --> 00:18:00,788 with his finger in your damn rectum? 474 00:18:00,913 --> 00:18:02,498 Right. Right. 475 00:18:02,623 --> 00:18:04,333 Hey. There's a parking lot. 476 00:18:04,458 --> 00:18:05,917 - Woo, let's go. - Yeah, let's do it. 477 00:18:06,042 --> 00:18:09,380 Get to work, baby. "Gotta Go"! 478 00:18:10,548 --> 00:18:12,215 Can I help you guys? 479 00:18:12,340 --> 00:18:14,302 We got, uh, we got a little business proposition for you. 480 00:18:14,427 --> 00:18:15,720 My name's Larry. 481 00:18:15,845 --> 00:18:17,138 - Hey, Larry. - This is Leon. 482 00:18:17,263 --> 00:18:18,888 - I'm Bill. - Here. Here you go, Bill. 483 00:18:19,015 --> 00:18:20,224 - "Gotta Go"? - That's right. 484 00:18:20,349 --> 00:18:21,976 You ever sit in that booth at this time of day 485 00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:23,978 and gotta go to the bathroom, what do you do? 486 00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:25,186 I just stay in the booth. 487 00:18:25,313 --> 00:18:26,897 I can't go anywhere, just gotta hold it in. 488 00:18:27,023 --> 00:18:28,858 Until now. For a dollar a minute, 489 00:18:28,983 --> 00:18:30,734 five dollar minimum, I will sit in that booth 490 00:18:30,859 --> 00:18:32,570 while you go and use the bathroom. 491 00:18:32,695 --> 00:18:34,030 - You're serious? - Very serious. 492 00:18:34,155 --> 00:18:36,157 - Right now, I really have to go. - [Larry] Go! 493 00:18:36,282 --> 00:18:37,575 [Leon] Go ahead, brother. 494 00:18:37,700 --> 00:18:38,951 - I'll be right back. - My man. 495 00:18:39,076 --> 00:18:40,661 - Thank you. - My man, I got you! 496 00:18:40,786 --> 00:18:42,246 My man, you gotta go! 497 00:18:42,371 --> 00:18:43,580 Ha-ha! 498 00:18:43,914 --> 00:18:45,541 - Look at this shit, Larry. Woo! - Huh? Told ya. 499 00:18:45,666 --> 00:18:48,294 - Did I tell ya? Huh? I told ya! - You fuckin' told me Larry. 500 00:18:50,588 --> 00:18:52,965 - You order a "Gotta Go"? - Yes, I gotta go. 501 00:18:53,090 --> 00:18:54,425 - Okay. You go. - Thank you. 502 00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:56,218 - Before I gotta go. Get on out of here. - Okay. 503 00:18:56,761 --> 00:18:59,388 - Gino! Go handle your business. - Bye. 504 00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:05,144 {\an8}Hey. Excuse me. 505 00:19:05,269 --> 00:19:08,064 - You just spat on my shoe. - It's a fuckin' spit shine. 506 00:19:08,189 --> 00:19:09,231 It's a-- Stop! 507 00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:10,983 Stop! Stop spitting on my shoe. 508 00:19:11,108 --> 00:19:12,359 I'm not, I'm not paying for this. 509 00:19:12,484 --> 00:19:13,694 - Okay? - Your tips are appreciated. 510 00:19:13,819 --> 00:19:16,571 Give me a fuckin' break. I'm not giving you a cent. 511 00:19:16,696 --> 00:19:19,909 Fuck it, then. I don't give a fuck. I don't work here. 512 00:19:20,034 --> 00:19:22,244 Woo! 513 00:19:22,369 --> 00:19:24,372 Ha-ha! Woo! 514 00:19:29,502 --> 00:19:31,087 Thank you. 515 00:19:31,212 --> 00:19:32,171 - Thank you for having me. - Thank you. 516 00:19:32,296 --> 00:19:33,964 - Yes, indeed. - My pleasure to have you. 517 00:19:34,090 --> 00:19:35,340 - And by the way, your home is lovely. - You're welcome. 518 00:19:35,675 --> 00:19:37,134 I should be complimenting you, too because-- 519 00:19:37,259 --> 00:19:38,469 [Richard] Well, I did pick out, 520 00:19:38,594 --> 00:19:39,970 I would say, a majority of the stuff. 521 00:19:40,096 --> 00:19:42,013 [Jon] Well, I can tell. Great taste. 522 00:19:42,138 --> 00:19:43,599 He's sitting down, Richard. 523 00:19:43,724 --> 00:19:44,975 Richard, he's sitting down. I can't-- 524 00:19:45,101 --> 00:19:46,394 He's gotta sit somewhere. 525 00:19:46,519 --> 00:19:48,020 - I can't-- I don't want-- - You know what? 526 00:19:48,145 --> 00:19:50,231 You can't sit on the arm. It's too thin. 527 00:19:50,356 --> 00:19:52,733 - No, I like a thick, cushy arm. - I agree with you. 528 00:19:52,858 --> 00:19:55,861 Excuse me, everyone, but dinner is ready. 529 00:19:55,986 --> 00:19:58,239 - Please follow me into the dining room. - Okay. 530 00:19:58,364 --> 00:19:59,740 This way. 531 00:19:59,865 --> 00:20:02,660 We have assigned seating, so everyone find your name. 532 00:20:03,119 --> 00:20:05,746 - [Jon] Here we are. - Welcome. Here we are. 533 00:20:05,871 --> 00:20:07,080 Richard, darling, this way. 534 00:20:07,205 --> 00:20:09,041 - [Richard] Thank you, babe. - [Michelle] Next to me. 535 00:20:09,166 --> 00:20:10,542 - Thank you. - Michelle. 536 00:20:10,667 --> 00:20:13,087 Wh-what's with the, uh, wooden chair here? 537 00:20:13,212 --> 00:20:14,672 Oh, you know, I'm so sorry. 538 00:20:14,797 --> 00:20:16,757 I-I-- This set only comes with seven chairs. 539 00:20:16,882 --> 00:20:18,467 - Seven chairs. - [Richard] Yeah, yeah, yeah. 540 00:20:18,592 --> 00:20:20,261 - How unusual. - [Richard] I was with her. 541 00:20:20,678 --> 00:20:22,680 - I never heard of that before. - Yeah. You know what? It was odd. 542 00:20:22,805 --> 00:20:25,015 It was weird, but I, I loved them, so, I went with it. 543 00:20:25,141 --> 00:20:26,934 - Ah. - [Richard] Hey, we're having a dinner. 544 00:20:27,435 --> 00:20:29,311 - Come on. Let's enjoy ourselves. - Okay, sure. You're right. 545 00:20:29,436 --> 00:20:31,272 - Let's all enjoy. Let's enjoy. - Yes! 546 00:20:31,397 --> 00:20:32,898 - [Michelle] Let's enjoy. - Let's enjoy. 547 00:20:33,357 --> 00:20:34,650 - That's the spirit. That's the spirit. - There we go. 548 00:20:34,775 --> 00:20:36,193 - Yes, let's enjoy. - Bless the new table. 549 00:20:36,694 --> 00:20:38,821 - About time. - Can I, uh, talk to you in the kitchen... 550 00:20:38,946 --> 00:20:39,696 - ...for a second? - Who, me? 551 00:20:39,821 --> 00:20:41,157 - Yeah. - What now? 552 00:20:41,282 --> 00:20:42,700 You got me sitting in that wooden chair? 553 00:20:42,825 --> 00:20:44,994 - It's embarrassing. - It's new furniture. 554 00:20:45,119 --> 00:20:47,705 She's afraid if you sit on it, you're gonna ruin it. 555 00:20:47,830 --> 00:20:49,330 I don't have a bleeding rectum. Okay? 556 00:20:49,457 --> 00:20:50,666 And even if I did, 557 00:20:50,791 --> 00:20:52,417 it's not gonna bleed onto the chair. 558 00:20:52,542 --> 00:20:54,962 How stupid! You could have said a million different things. 559 00:20:55,087 --> 00:20:56,922 A rectum came to my mind first. 560 00:20:57,047 --> 00:20:59,133 You could have at least said I was better, that I was over it. 561 00:20:59,258 --> 00:21:00,968 - I forgot. - All right. 562 00:21:01,093 --> 00:21:02,052 The chair's in the house. 563 00:21:02,178 --> 00:21:04,555 You tell the CEO that I want that chair. 564 00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:06,098 You can't get one. 565 00:21:06,223 --> 00:21:07,349 If I don't get a normal chair, 566 00:21:07,475 --> 00:21:10,102 I'm gonna blow this bullshit bleeding rectum story 567 00:21:10,227 --> 00:21:12,104 sky high. Okay? 568 00:21:12,229 --> 00:21:13,773 So get me a normal chair. 569 00:21:13,898 --> 00:21:15,608 I'd really appreciate it. 570 00:21:15,733 --> 00:21:17,109 All right, you'll get the chair. 571 00:21:17,234 --> 00:21:18,611 - Okay? - [Michelle] That's great. 572 00:21:18,736 --> 00:21:20,654 Let's get the salads, and... 573 00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:23,491 egg rolls out. We'll wait about 15 minutes for dinner? 574 00:21:23,616 --> 00:21:24,909 Hey, Michelle. Hi, honey. 575 00:21:25,034 --> 00:21:27,453 - Hi. What's going on? - Listen, I spoke to Larry, 576 00:21:27,578 --> 00:21:29,830 and he's really embarrassed, and, uh... 577 00:21:29,955 --> 00:21:31,499 you gotta get him the chair. 578 00:21:31,624 --> 00:21:33,375 - Oh, no. Absolutely not. - You have to get him a regular chair. 579 00:21:33,501 --> 00:21:35,044 No, he's not-- he's not sitting in the chair. 580 00:21:35,169 --> 00:21:38,172 - No. - He said he'd really appreciate it. 581 00:21:38,631 --> 00:21:41,467 Really? He said that? He said he would appreciate it? 582 00:21:41,592 --> 00:21:43,344 Yeah, I wouldn't lie to you. 583 00:21:43,469 --> 00:21:45,012 Okay. Okay, fine. Fine, fine. 584 00:21:45,137 --> 00:21:47,306 Let him, let him sit in the chair, but... 585 00:21:47,431 --> 00:21:49,558 if he bleeds in my new chair, 586 00:21:49,683 --> 00:21:51,602 you're in big fuckin' trouble. 587 00:21:54,814 --> 00:21:55,898 - Ooh. - Mm. 588 00:21:56,023 --> 00:21:57,483 [Cassie] Okay. So, Jon. 589 00:21:57,608 --> 00:22:01,028 - You're playing a Larry-type character... - Yes. 590 00:22:01,153 --> 00:22:02,279 ...in this movie. So, uh, 591 00:22:02,404 --> 00:22:04,073 what does the character even do? 592 00:22:04,198 --> 00:22:05,741 - He's a sitcom writer. - [Cassie] Of course. 593 00:22:05,866 --> 00:22:07,535 Uh, but the whole-- Very successful. The whole thing is, 594 00:22:07,660 --> 00:22:10,579 it turns out that the thing he's most known for, 595 00:22:10,704 --> 00:22:12,915 his big sitcom that he created, 596 00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:15,417 he stole it from an Australian sitcom. 597 00:22:15,542 --> 00:22:16,961 - [Larry] What? - The guy's a total fraud. 598 00:22:17,086 --> 00:22:18,295 He stole the idea. 599 00:22:18,420 --> 00:22:19,171 - He stole-- - What? 600 00:22:19,296 --> 00:22:20,506 What do you mean? Stole it? 601 00:22:20,631 --> 00:22:21,715 I didn't steal anything. 602 00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:23,008 No, in the movie, not you. 603 00:22:23,133 --> 00:22:24,593 - It sort of implies that... - [Larry] Yeah! 604 00:22:24,718 --> 00:22:26,387 - ...their show is stolen. - [Larry] Yes! 605 00:22:26,512 --> 00:22:27,972 The character's name is Lawrence Dean. 606 00:22:28,097 --> 00:22:29,890 - Lawrence Dean? What? - It isn't the same as Larry David. 607 00:22:30,015 --> 00:22:32,977 Hey, hey, hey. Guess what I found? I found a chair! 608 00:22:33,102 --> 00:22:34,520 Oh! 609 00:22:34,645 --> 00:22:36,021 Yes! Hey! 610 00:22:36,146 --> 00:22:38,773 - What a miracle. - [Richard] It was in the garage. 611 00:22:38,898 --> 00:22:40,192 [Michelle] How come you didn't tell me? 612 00:22:40,317 --> 00:22:41,527 [Richard] I didn't know it was a chair. 613 00:22:41,652 --> 00:22:42,736 - It was all wrapped up. - Ooh. 614 00:22:42,862 --> 00:22:44,196 It was wrapped up in plastic. 615 00:22:44,321 --> 00:22:46,240 I thought it was, uh, my dead grandmother's ghost. 616 00:22:46,365 --> 00:22:48,868 - I didn't know what the fuck it was. - How could you not tell me? 617 00:22:48,993 --> 00:22:50,828 - What a lucky thing. - [Richard] Yeah. 618 00:22:50,953 --> 00:22:53,289 Because they didn't know, and they just found it 619 00:22:53,414 --> 00:22:55,708 - in the garage. - It all worked out. Look at that! 620 00:22:55,833 --> 00:22:58,042 - They're very comfortable, very pretty. - [Larry] Yeah. 621 00:22:58,167 --> 00:23:00,713 It's very bouncy. It's, it's kind of bouncy. 622 00:23:00,838 --> 00:23:01,672 [Larry] Yeah. I love this chair. 623 00:23:01,797 --> 00:23:03,132 [Jon] Now we can eat. 624 00:23:03,257 --> 00:23:05,342 - Want more of these? - [Larry] Ah. Love Chinese. 625 00:23:05,467 --> 00:23:07,094 Thank you. 626 00:23:07,845 --> 00:23:11,807 You guys, do you pick up the rice bowl and eat it like this? 627 00:23:11,932 --> 00:23:14,518 Or do you start on the table, 628 00:23:14,643 --> 00:23:16,936 and then pick it up, pick the rice up? 629 00:23:17,061 --> 00:23:18,480 You pick up the bowl first. 630 00:23:18,606 --> 00:23:19,773 Oh, you pick it right-- eat it right out of the bowl. 631 00:23:19,898 --> 00:23:21,233 Yeah, eat right out of the bowl. 632 00:23:21,358 --> 00:23:22,859 It's just like eating it over the garbage can. 633 00:23:22,984 --> 00:23:24,904 - [Alex] Huh? - [Larry] Yeah, yeah. In a way. 634 00:23:25,029 --> 00:23:26,405 Oh, Michelle. 635 00:23:26,530 --> 00:23:29,532 - The walnut shrimp is scrumptious. - Mm. 636 00:23:29,657 --> 00:23:30,910 Scrumptious? 637 00:23:31,035 --> 00:23:32,703 - You think so? - It's really good. 638 00:23:33,454 --> 00:23:35,789 - What are we waiting for? - I mean, come on. Come on. 639 00:23:36,665 --> 00:23:38,626 - [Larry] Hey, hey, hey, hey. - What are you doing? 640 00:23:38,751 --> 00:23:40,544 - What are you doing? I want the walnut shrimp? - What are you doing? 641 00:23:40,669 --> 00:23:43,714 [Andy] I'm turning the Lazy Susan the way it should be turned. 642 00:23:43,839 --> 00:23:45,674 - In order. - [Larry] No, no, no, no, no. 643 00:23:45,799 --> 00:23:48,385 A Lazy Susan is like a roundabout, okay? 644 00:23:48,510 --> 00:23:50,638 I'm sorry, I don't think you're right. 645 00:23:50,763 --> 00:23:52,473 [Cassie] Okay, can I-- -I don't think you know how a roundabout works. 646 00:23:52,598 --> 00:23:54,183 It's first come, first serve. That's a roundabout. 647 00:23:54,642 --> 00:23:56,602 - I do know how a roundabout works. - I don't think you do. 648 00:23:56,727 --> 00:23:58,896 - It works like a Lazy Susan. - [Larry] No! 649 00:23:59,021 --> 00:24:00,731 The cars-- -That's now how a lazy Susan works. 650 00:24:00,856 --> 00:24:02,358 - Can I ask you a favor, please? - It's how a lazy Susan-- 651 00:24:02,483 --> 00:24:04,068 Can I ask you both a favor? 652 00:24:04,193 --> 00:24:07,029 Can you please not use that term "Lazy Susan"? 653 00:24:07,154 --> 00:24:09,823 It's got racist and sexist connotations, 654 00:24:09,949 --> 00:24:11,241 and I'd really prefer 655 00:24:11,367 --> 00:24:13,869 - you just not call it that. - Whoa. 656 00:24:13,994 --> 00:24:14,994 - [Larry] Lazy Susan? - Yes. 657 00:24:15,119 --> 00:24:17,080 Who's that racist towards? Susans? 658 00:24:17,205 --> 00:24:18,749 [Larry] That's crazy. Where'd you get that? - [Cassie] Okay. 659 00:24:18,874 --> 00:24:20,751 I would just like you to not use the term. 660 00:24:20,876 --> 00:24:22,586 You're right. You know what? It should be-- 661 00:24:22,711 --> 00:24:24,588 We should definitely start using the Ambitious Susan. 662 00:24:24,713 --> 00:24:26,882 Yes, yes. Please spin the indefatigable Susan. 663 00:24:27,007 --> 00:24:30,803 Oh, can we have the Multifaceted Susan my way, please? 664 00:24:30,928 --> 00:24:32,596 Yeah, spin the Industrious Susan. 665 00:24:32,721 --> 00:24:34,848 Ooh, can you spin Ambidextrous Susan, please. 666 00:24:34,974 --> 00:24:36,392 - Oh, the Ambidextrous Susan. - Yes, both ways. 667 00:24:36,517 --> 00:24:38,102 - Both ways. - So funny. You want it? 668 00:24:38,227 --> 00:24:41,355 - You want it? You want your stuff? - Whoa! 669 00:24:43,440 --> 00:24:44,984 Whoa! 670 00:24:51,156 --> 00:24:52,866 [Richard] Oh, man. 671 00:24:53,826 --> 00:24:56,161 - [Andy] Oh, boy. - What did you do? 672 00:24:56,286 --> 00:24:57,788 - [Larry] What? I, I didn't-- - What did you do? 673 00:24:58,414 --> 00:25:00,833 - She spun the thing around like that. - The thing, it was too fast. 674 00:25:00,958 --> 00:25:04,211 You wouldn't shut up! 675 00:25:04,336 --> 00:25:06,755 I don't give a shit! I want you out! 676 00:25:06,880 --> 00:25:09,590 - You're kicking me out? - [Michelle] Yeah. And you, 677 00:25:09,717 --> 00:25:11,510 Larry David Junior, you can go, too. 678 00:25:11,635 --> 00:25:13,554 - You're kicking me out. - Yes Jon Hamm. 679 00:25:13,679 --> 00:25:16,181 - Hey, you're getting kicked out. Look at that, beautiful. - What's up, huh? Hey. 680 00:25:16,306 --> 00:25:17,850 Out! 681 00:25:18,350 --> 00:25:20,644 - All right. - All right. 682 00:25:20,769 --> 00:25:22,855 - Okay. - We should, uh... 683 00:25:22,980 --> 00:25:24,648 - Eh. - Eh. 684 00:25:33,198 --> 00:25:34,782 [Larry] Hey. 685 00:25:34,907 --> 00:25:36,702 {\an8}[Becky] Larry. Oh, thank God you answered. 686 00:25:36,827 --> 00:25:39,163 I just got in a huge accident on Mount-- 687 00:25:39,288 --> 00:25:40,497 Wha? 688 00:25:40,955 --> 00:25:42,499 Becky It was a ski school of children. 689 00:25:42,624 --> 00:25:45,002 They just flew right in front of me. Ow! 690 00:25:45,127 --> 00:25:47,713 Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. 691 00:25:47,838 --> 00:25:49,006 They're taking me to a hospital, 692 00:25:49,131 --> 00:25:50,924 and I don't-- I just don't know where it is or... 693 00:25:51,050 --> 00:25:52,801 - I don't know this town. - Okay, don't worry about a thing. 694 00:25:52,926 --> 00:25:54,344 I'll be on the next flight to Denver. 695 00:25:54,470 --> 00:25:56,263 - You would do that for me? - Of course. 696 00:25:56,388 --> 00:25:59,099 Oh, my God, Larry. You really are a prince. 697 00:25:59,224 --> 00:26:01,518 Don't worry. I'm calling my travel agent right now. 698 00:26:01,643 --> 00:26:04,021 Thank you so, so much. Ow! 699 00:26:04,146 --> 00:26:05,856 Westside Travel and Tour. 700 00:26:06,356 --> 00:26:08,567 - Eliza speaking. - Oh, hi. It's Larry David. I have an emergency. 701 00:26:08,692 --> 00:26:10,736 I need to get on the next flight to Denver, please. 702 00:26:10,861 --> 00:26:13,196 I've got one leaving in an hour and 40 minutes. 703 00:26:13,321 --> 00:26:14,865 Perfect. Fantastic. Book it. 704 00:26:14,990 --> 00:26:17,076 [Eliza] Oh, you're lucky. There's only one seat left. 705 00:26:17,201 --> 00:26:19,203 19E. 706 00:26:20,913 --> 00:26:22,539 19E. 707 00:26:22,664 --> 00:26:25,375 It's a coach seat. Oh, it's a middle seat. 708 00:26:27,294 --> 00:26:28,921 Shall I book it? 709 00:26:29,046 --> 00:26:31,215 Any other flights going to Denver? 710 00:26:31,340 --> 00:26:33,217 We've got a two, a four, 711 00:26:33,342 --> 00:26:34,468 and a six. 712 00:26:34,593 --> 00:26:38,847 Anything in rows... one through four? 713 00:26:38,972 --> 00:26:41,100 The only thing left is coach. 714 00:26:42,351 --> 00:26:43,435 Okay. 715 00:26:44,603 --> 00:26:46,814 Give me the next first-class flight to Denver. 716 00:26:46,939 --> 00:26:49,108 It's not until 9:00 p.m. 717 00:26:49,233 --> 00:26:51,359 9:00 p.m. Perfect. I'll take it. Book it. 718 00:26:51,484 --> 00:26:52,778 [Eliza] Very well. 719 00:27:01,494 --> 00:27:02,412 Hey. 720 00:27:02,538 --> 00:27:03,413 Hey, Larry. 721 00:27:03,539 --> 00:27:04,498 I got a "Gotta Go" emergency. 722 00:27:04,832 --> 00:27:06,250 I'm at the shoe shine shop, right? 723 00:27:06,375 --> 00:27:07,917 And the guy must have food poisoning. 724 00:27:08,042 --> 00:27:09,920 He's stuck on the fuckin' toilet right now. 725 00:27:10,045 --> 00:27:11,088 So? What do you want me to do? 726 00:27:11,213 --> 00:27:12,673 I need you to cover for me at the news stand. 727 00:27:12,798 --> 00:27:14,800 The guy relies on me for his six o'clock piss. 728 00:27:14,925 --> 00:27:17,469 - I'll call you back. - Leon Okay. Okay. 729 00:27:17,594 --> 00:27:19,263 - [Larry claps] Hey. - Yeah. 730 00:27:19,388 --> 00:27:21,640 I need you to do me a favor. Actually, do Leon a favor. 731 00:27:21,765 --> 00:27:24,143 He needs somebody to fill in for him at the news stand. 732 00:27:24,268 --> 00:27:25,644 - For the "Gotta Go" app? - Yeah. 733 00:27:25,769 --> 00:27:27,020 I can't do it. 734 00:27:27,146 --> 00:27:28,397 No, no. You gotta do it. I can't do it, 735 00:27:28,522 --> 00:27:29,857 because I have to fly to Denver. 736 00:27:29,982 --> 00:27:32,192 - I already got my sweats on. - So what? 737 00:27:32,317 --> 00:27:33,694 Yeah, well, once I got my sweats on, 738 00:27:33,819 --> 00:27:36,321 there's no going back. I got my sweats on. 739 00:27:36,446 --> 00:27:37,948 What is it, an immutable law of physics? 740 00:27:38,073 --> 00:27:39,532 Once you're in sweats, you can't get out? 741 00:27:39,657 --> 00:27:40,659 Newton's Law of Sweats? 742 00:27:40,784 --> 00:27:43,912 It's Jeff Greene's Law of Day Over. 743 00:27:44,037 --> 00:27:45,539 Listen, I'd really appreciate it. 744 00:27:45,664 --> 00:27:48,167 I'm in my sweats! 745 00:27:48,292 --> 00:27:50,252 - Hello? - Larry, what the fuck you doin', man? 746 00:27:50,377 --> 00:27:52,171 - Goddamn! - Larry All right, okay! 747 00:27:52,296 --> 00:27:54,298 Shut the fuck up! I'll come! 748 00:27:54,423 --> 00:27:55,799 Thank you. Thank you, by the way. 749 00:27:55,924 --> 00:27:58,760 - Wow. - [Larry] God bless you. 750 00:28:04,057 --> 00:28:05,184 Hey. 751 00:28:05,309 --> 00:28:06,977 - Hey. I'm from "Gotta Go." - Larry? 752 00:28:07,102 --> 00:28:08,854 - Yeah. Yeah. - Oh. 753 00:28:08,979 --> 00:28:11,690 - I really gotta go. - Okay. Okay. Hurry up. 754 00:28:11,815 --> 00:28:13,108 - Okay. I'll be quick. - Okay. 755 00:28:13,233 --> 00:28:14,818 - Okay. Thank you. - Yeah. Hurry up. 756 00:28:14,943 --> 00:28:16,111 Okay. 757 00:28:19,071 --> 00:28:20,407 Fuck. 758 00:28:22,951 --> 00:28:24,286 Oh, my God. 759 00:28:24,411 --> 00:28:25,829 Hello? 760 00:28:26,205 --> 00:28:27,539 Larry The news stand guy left 15 minutes ago. 761 00:28:27,664 --> 00:28:28,665 Hasn't come back. 762 00:28:28,790 --> 00:28:30,417 I gotta catch a plane to Denver. 763 00:28:30,542 --> 00:28:32,002 Hey, no browsing. 764 00:28:32,127 --> 00:28:33,545 Hey, do you carry Vegan Living? 765 00:28:33,670 --> 00:28:35,797 Who gives a shit? Get the hell out of here. 766 00:28:35,923 --> 00:28:36,924 You gotta come and relieve me. 767 00:28:37,049 --> 00:28:38,800 I can't, Larry. I'm at the shoe shine stand. 768 00:28:38,926 --> 00:28:40,636 This guy's taking a $40 shit. 769 00:28:40,761 --> 00:28:42,679 Larry Aw! All right, I'll get somebody else. 770 00:28:45,891 --> 00:28:47,601 Thanks very much. Hey. 771 00:28:47,726 --> 00:28:48,727 [Larry] Hey! 772 00:28:48,852 --> 00:28:50,520 - I got your back. - Oh, my God. 773 00:28:50,646 --> 00:28:52,439 - You are a lifesaver. - No worries, no worries. 774 00:28:52,564 --> 00:28:54,942 - Thank you so much. - Not at all. 775 00:28:55,067 --> 00:28:56,443 Jonny. 776 00:28:56,568 --> 00:28:58,153 Really appreciate this. 777 00:28:58,278 --> 00:28:59,696 Hey, no prob-- 778 00:28:59,821 --> 00:29:01,657 - Ah? - [Larry] Ah? 779 00:29:01,782 --> 00:29:03,367 I get it. 780 00:29:08,372 --> 00:29:09,831 [Larry] Oh, my God. 781 00:29:12,459 --> 00:29:13,710 Excuse me, I'm so sorry. 782 00:29:13,835 --> 00:29:15,337 I got seven minutes to catch the plane. 783 00:29:15,462 --> 00:29:17,381 It sounds like a lie, but it's not. 784 00:29:17,506 --> 00:29:18,715 I'm not a cutter by nature. 785 00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:20,759 Um, my, my girlfriend got in a skiing accident. 786 00:29:20,884 --> 00:29:22,511 You know, she's my ex-wife's sister. 787 00:29:22,636 --> 00:29:24,429 We don't have to get into that, but, 788 00:29:24,554 --> 00:29:26,265 nevertheless, thank you so much. 789 00:29:26,390 --> 00:29:28,183 - I really appreciate it. - Next. 790 00:29:28,308 --> 00:29:29,476 Are you together? 791 00:29:31,645 --> 00:29:32,771 No. 792 00:29:33,397 --> 00:29:34,815 No. 793 00:29:36,149 --> 00:29:37,526 Why would you think we were together? 794 00:29:37,651 --> 00:29:38,652 No reason. 795 00:29:38,777 --> 00:29:40,737 - No, no reason at all? - No reason? 796 00:29:40,862 --> 00:29:42,364 I just assumed you were a couple-- 797 00:29:42,489 --> 00:29:43,824 - You assumed? - You assumed-- 798 00:29:44,199 --> 00:29:45,784 - Oh, really? - You assumed we're a couple. We-- 799 00:29:45,909 --> 00:29:47,619 I mean, I've never-- I mean, nice to meet you. 800 00:29:47,744 --> 00:29:49,997 - Nice to meet you, too. - Yeah, see, look, we just met. 801 00:29:50,122 --> 00:29:51,707 Honest mistake. 802 00:29:51,832 --> 00:29:53,709 But why did you make the mistake? 803 00:29:53,834 --> 00:29:57,462 - That's what I'm wondering. - Any two people standing together could be a couple. 804 00:29:57,587 --> 00:29:58,839 Two men, two women. 805 00:29:58,964 --> 00:30:01,174 If I saw a man wearing a yarmulke, 806 00:30:01,300 --> 00:30:03,385 standing next to a woman wearing a kerchief 807 00:30:03,510 --> 00:30:05,220 and carrying a mahjong set, 808 00:30:05,345 --> 00:30:06,888 I would think they were a couple. 809 00:30:07,014 --> 00:30:08,932 - What? - It's just a natural assumption. 810 00:30:09,057 --> 00:30:10,934 Anyway, I'd love to continue our discussion. 811 00:30:11,059 --> 00:30:12,769 It's been very interesting. I have to catch a flight to Denver. 812 00:30:13,395 --> 00:30:16,064 - Eh, there's a lot of black people in Denver. - Yeah. Tell 'em we said hi. 813 00:30:16,189 --> 00:30:17,441 Hello, sir. Boarding pass? 814 00:30:19,151 --> 00:30:21,445 You've been randomly selected for a security search, sir. 815 00:30:21,570 --> 00:30:24,156 What? What? Secure-- What are you talking about? 816 00:30:24,281 --> 00:30:26,325 - Can someone get my spot? Thank you. - [Larry] Oh, please. 817 00:30:26,450 --> 00:30:28,910 Are you kidding me? Oh, they couldn't be a couple. 818 00:30:29,036 --> 00:30:30,078 Oh, it's crazy. 819 00:30:30,203 --> 00:30:31,288 It has nothing to do with that, sir. 820 00:30:31,413 --> 00:30:33,457 Oh, it has nothing to do with that? 821 00:30:33,582 --> 00:30:35,584 - No. - Come on, I'm gonna miss my flight to Denver. 822 00:30:35,709 --> 00:30:37,919 - Enjoy that search. Yeah. - Enjoy it. 823 00:30:38,045 --> 00:30:39,087 Honestly, if you're looking-- 824 00:30:39,212 --> 00:30:40,464 I wouldn't look in the food and wine section. 825 00:30:40,589 --> 00:30:42,549 I would look... Los Angeles magazine. 826 00:30:42,674 --> 00:30:43,759 Right down there. 827 00:30:43,884 --> 00:30:45,135 You don't find what you need, 828 00:30:45,260 --> 00:30:46,803 - look online. Everything's online. - Thanks. 829 00:30:46,928 --> 00:30:48,638 Excuse me, ma'am. No browsing. 830 00:30:48,764 --> 00:30:51,016 No, I'm just looking for an article that Jay Inslee-- 831 00:30:51,141 --> 00:30:52,267 Oh. 832 00:30:52,392 --> 00:30:54,061 - Oh, hi. - Cheryl. 833 00:30:54,186 --> 00:30:55,228 - Jon. - That's me. 834 00:30:55,354 --> 00:30:56,521 - Hamm. Hi. - Yes. 835 00:30:56,646 --> 00:30:57,731 What are you doing here? 836 00:30:57,856 --> 00:30:59,316 I'm just watching the news stand for Larry. 837 00:30:59,441 --> 00:31:01,610 He had to-- He had to jump out and run to the airport. 838 00:31:01,735 --> 00:31:04,780 I'm sorry. Does Larry own a news stand now? 839 00:31:04,905 --> 00:31:06,198 Great question. 840 00:31:06,323 --> 00:31:08,158 - I don't have an answer. - Okay. 841 00:31:08,283 --> 00:31:10,827 - So you are Larry's ex-wife. Wow. - Yeah. I know. 842 00:31:10,952 --> 00:31:13,830 - I find that fascinating. - Do you? 843 00:31:13,955 --> 00:31:16,500 Oh, my gosh. Spending the last few days with him? 844 00:31:16,625 --> 00:31:19,294 - I gotta know everything. - It's a lot. 845 00:31:19,419 --> 00:31:21,755 Well, do you wanna just go get some coffee? 846 00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:23,965 Sit down and talk? 847 00:31:24,091 --> 00:31:26,009 - Now? - Well, yeah. Why not? 848 00:31:26,134 --> 00:31:27,969 - Okay. Uh... - Let's go. 849 00:31:28,929 --> 00:31:30,764 I mean, do you really wanna hear... 850 00:31:30,889 --> 00:31:32,933 Are you kidding me? I wanna hear everything. 851 00:31:33,058 --> 00:31:35,268 [Cheryl] You might be bored. Ah,17 years... 852 00:31:35,394 --> 00:31:36,812 [Jon] Wow. 853 00:31:45,654 --> 00:31:47,030 Do you recognize that signature? 854 00:31:47,155 --> 00:31:48,573 [Leon] He killed the motherfucker 'cause the waffles 855 00:31:48,698 --> 00:31:50,117 had expired and shit. 856 00:31:50,242 --> 00:31:52,494 Gonna sit in that room and get interrogated-- 857 00:31:52,619 --> 00:31:54,663 Hey. Okay? You happy? You happy? 858 00:31:54,788 --> 00:31:56,415 - I hope you're happy. - What the fuck, man? 859 00:31:56,540 --> 00:31:58,375 - I missed my flight to Denver. - [Jeff] Sorry. 860 00:31:58,500 --> 00:32:00,377 [Larry] Oh, because you wouldn't get out of your sweat pants. 861 00:32:00,502 --> 00:32:02,212 Suppose there was an emergency? Then what? 862 00:32:02,337 --> 00:32:03,630 You take the sweat pants off? 863 00:32:03,755 --> 00:32:04,881 Well, what kind of an emergency? 864 00:32:05,006 --> 00:32:07,509 Suppose, uh, your friend was in a car accident. 865 00:32:07,634 --> 00:32:10,387 - Which friend? - Me. I got hit by a car. 866 00:32:10,512 --> 00:32:11,847 How did you get hit by a car? 867 00:32:11,972 --> 00:32:13,223 I, I got a piece of pizza, and, 868 00:32:13,348 --> 00:32:14,724 and I was crossing the street, 869 00:32:14,850 --> 00:32:16,101 and the, the cheese fell off, 870 00:32:16,226 --> 00:32:17,602 and I bent down to pick up the cheese, 871 00:32:17,727 --> 00:32:19,312 and I got hit by a car. 872 00:32:19,438 --> 00:32:21,273 Who the hell picks up cheese in the middle of the street? 873 00:32:21,398 --> 00:32:22,899 I don't want to litter so I picked up the cheese 874 00:32:23,024 --> 00:32:24,484 and I put it in the garbage can. 875 00:32:24,609 --> 00:32:26,820 No. You were gonna pick up the cheese, 876 00:32:26,945 --> 00:32:28,447 and put it on your pizza and eat it. 877 00:32:28,822 --> 00:32:30,740 Bullshit. I was not. I was gonna throw it in the garbage. 878 00:32:30,866 --> 00:32:31,825 - You don't know. - I know. 879 00:32:32,242 --> 00:32:33,285 - What do you know? No, you don't! - I know. 880 00:32:33,743 --> 00:32:34,870 And you, Fuckstick, don't ever ask me 881 00:32:35,245 --> 00:32:36,997 to man any post for you again, 'cause I'm not doin' it! 882 00:32:37,122 --> 00:32:39,082 Just consider me in sweatpants all the time. 883 00:32:39,207 --> 00:32:41,293 Fuck that job. I quit that shit already. 884 00:32:41,418 --> 00:32:44,671 - Wow. That was fast. - Fuck, yeah. I'm in and out. 885 00:32:44,796 --> 00:32:46,590 All right, I gotta go text Becky now 886 00:32:46,715 --> 00:32:48,341 and tell her I missed my flight 'cause of you two assholes, 887 00:32:48,467 --> 00:32:49,801 and tell her I'll be on the first flight out to Denver 888 00:32:49,926 --> 00:32:51,553 tomorrow morning. Actually, second flight. 889 00:32:51,678 --> 00:32:53,054 Why second flight? 890 00:32:53,180 --> 00:32:54,639 First class. 891 00:32:54,764 --> 00:32:56,099 Yeah. 892 00:32:56,725 --> 00:32:59,728 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 893 00:32:59,853 --> 00:33:02,022 Oh, my God. What? 894 00:33:02,147 --> 00:33:04,065 Oh, my-- Larry! 895 00:33:04,191 --> 00:33:05,442 Larry! 896 00:33:06,902 --> 00:33:08,695 Larry! 897 00:33:08,820 --> 00:33:10,238 [Cheryl] Oh, look. 898 00:33:10,363 --> 00:33:11,364 Latte Larry's. 899 00:33:11,490 --> 00:33:12,824 - Yeah. Yeah. - Spite store. 900 00:33:12,949 --> 00:33:14,201 - I heard about this. - Yeah. 901 00:33:14,326 --> 00:33:15,619 - This must be, uh... - Mocha Joe's. 902 00:33:15,744 --> 00:33:16,912 There we go. 903 00:33:17,037 --> 00:33:18,038 Okay, don't tell Larry we did this. 904 00:33:18,163 --> 00:33:19,789 You got it. 905 00:33:19,915 --> 00:33:22,959 I've never been in this shop. I just-- 906 00:33:23,084 --> 00:33:25,795 It's kind of a wobbly table, you know? 907 00:33:25,921 --> 00:33:27,339 It's like my least favorite thing. 908 00:33:27,464 --> 00:33:29,049 - It's all right. - [Mocha Joe] Here we go. 909 00:33:29,174 --> 00:33:30,717 - Two cups of coffee. - Hey. Thank you very much. 910 00:33:30,842 --> 00:33:33,053 Thank you so much for coming in, Mr. Hamm. How's that scone? 911 00:33:33,178 --> 00:33:34,596 Uh, not so much a scone. 912 00:33:35,055 --> 00:33:37,599 - No, it's a scone. - Nah, this is like a muffin. 913 00:33:37,724 --> 00:33:40,060 I mean, I'm just saying, like, there's kind of a specific 914 00:33:40,185 --> 00:33:42,103 quality that a scone has that's sort of dry and crumbly. 915 00:33:42,229 --> 00:33:44,648 This is sweet. It's a little more like a muffin than a scone. 916 00:33:44,773 --> 00:33:46,650 What you are describing is a stale scone. 917 00:33:46,775 --> 00:33:49,528 - That's a, that's fresh one. - I'm not sure you know what a... 918 00:33:49,653 --> 00:33:51,112 definition of a scone is. 919 00:33:51,238 --> 00:33:52,948 It looks good. I think, um... 920 00:33:53,073 --> 00:33:54,741 - I'm just saying, I'm saying it's a muffin. - Let's not worry about it. 921 00:33:54,866 --> 00:33:56,201 You want me to take it away? 922 00:33:56,326 --> 00:33:57,494 No, I'm gonna keep the muffin. 923 00:33:57,619 --> 00:33:58,745 - Thank you very much. - You enjoy the scone. 924 00:33:59,162 --> 00:34:00,539 - Yeah, I'll enjoy the muffin. - [Cheryl] I'm good. 925 00:34:00,914 --> 00:34:02,707 - Thank you, that's great. Thank you. - Okay. Awesome. 926 00:34:02,832 --> 00:34:03,792 It doesn't matter. 927 00:34:04,376 --> 00:34:05,835 - Yeah. I'm just having a good time. - Hmm? Doesn't it? 928 00:34:06,962 --> 00:34:08,463 Um... 929 00:34:08,588 --> 00:34:10,674 Oh! So when I first met Mocha Joe-- 930 00:34:10,799 --> 00:34:13,176 Ugh. Oh, hold on. 931 00:34:13,301 --> 00:34:14,844 - No. No. No. - What's wrong? 932 00:34:14,969 --> 00:34:16,012 Mocha Joe! 933 00:34:16,137 --> 00:34:17,973 - Mocha Joe! - [Mocha Joe] Yeah. 934 00:34:19,641 --> 00:34:22,143 This coffee's... it's not hot. 935 00:34:22,268 --> 00:34:24,563 - It's plenty hot. - No, it's, it's plenty not. 936 00:34:24,688 --> 00:34:27,482 - It's, it's, it is, it is at best Luke. - It's hot. 937 00:34:27,607 --> 00:34:29,359 - Oh, God. - [Jon] I don't know what to tell you. 938 00:34:29,484 --> 00:34:31,111 This is not, this is not a hot cup of coffee. 939 00:34:31,236 --> 00:34:32,571 - It's a hot cup of coffee. - Coffee should be served hot. 940 00:34:32,696 --> 00:34:33,863 - This is not hot. - It's hot. 941 00:34:33,989 --> 00:34:35,114 I beg to differ. This is not hot. 942 00:34:35,448 --> 00:34:36,825 And I tell you what. Here's how I'll prove it to you. 943 00:34:37,200 --> 00:34:37,993 - No, no, no, I don't know-- - Would I be able to do this? 944 00:34:38,285 --> 00:34:39,578 Would I be able to do this 945 00:34:39,703 --> 00:34:41,454 if this was a hot cup of coffee? 946 00:34:42,247 --> 00:34:43,790 - Oh. Oh. - Okay. 947 00:34:44,708 --> 00:34:47,043 - Doesn't even hurt. Doesn't even hurt. - I can't do this. 948 00:34:47,168 --> 00:34:48,210 - This coffee's not hot. - Jon Hamm... 949 00:34:48,335 --> 00:34:49,838 - ...you have turned into Larry. - What-- 950 00:34:49,963 --> 00:34:52,090 - I'm done. I can't do this. - Cheryl-- 951 00:34:52,215 --> 00:34:53,049 [Cheryl] God. 952 00:34:53,174 --> 00:34:54,551 - Cheryl! - No. 953 00:34:54,676 --> 00:34:56,344 - Come on. - Nope. 954 00:34:57,344 --> 00:34:59,764 See, now look. The table. Look at this. All over the place. 955 00:34:59,889 --> 00:35:01,266 - All right, you know what, Jon Hamm? - All over the place. 956 00:35:01,391 --> 00:35:02,767 - Unbelievable. - Get out. 957 00:35:03,351 --> 00:35:04,518 Happy to. 958 00:35:06,855 --> 00:35:08,398 And you're banned, Jon Hamm! 959 00:35:08,523 --> 00:35:10,442 [Jon] I don't care! 960 00:35:16,573 --> 00:35:17,991 Hey! 961 00:35:18,116 --> 00:35:20,201 I'm here! 962 00:35:20,327 --> 00:35:22,746 Look. Look! Flowers, balloons. 963 00:35:22,871 --> 00:35:25,498 Larry David. What could be better? 964 00:35:25,623 --> 00:35:28,209 - Take a smell of that. Yeah? Pretty good. - Yep. Smells like flowers. 965 00:35:28,335 --> 00:35:30,253 - Right? Where do you want 'em? Here? - Yeah. 966 00:35:30,378 --> 00:35:33,006 Ugh. I came as soon as I could. 967 00:35:33,131 --> 00:35:34,299 Did you? 968 00:35:34,424 --> 00:35:35,634 Yes, I did. 969 00:35:35,759 --> 00:35:38,094 'Cause it's, uh, been a little over 24 hours 970 00:35:38,219 --> 00:35:39,846 since I called you and you were gonna 971 00:35:39,971 --> 00:35:42,891 hop on the next flight. So I just, I've been a little confused. 972 00:35:43,016 --> 00:35:45,018 Big issue with the TSA last night. 973 00:35:45,143 --> 00:35:47,854 - Ugh. I'm not even gonna bore you with it. - Why would book a night flight? 974 00:35:47,979 --> 00:35:49,981 I called you at 10:00 o'clock yesterday morning. 975 00:35:50,106 --> 00:35:53,109 Um, you know, the-- I couldn't get a seat. There were no seats. 976 00:35:53,234 --> 00:35:55,904 There were no seats on any of the planes? 977 00:35:56,029 --> 00:35:58,114 There were... 978 00:35:58,239 --> 00:35:59,866 no seats... 979 00:35:59,991 --> 00:36:01,076 for me? 980 00:36:01,201 --> 00:36:05,080 Are you talking about first class seats? 981 00:36:05,205 --> 00:36:07,916 Uh... 982 00:36:10,001 --> 00:36:11,710 - Yeah. Yeah. - [Becky] Yeah? 983 00:36:11,835 --> 00:36:12,879 I broke my leg! 984 00:36:13,004 --> 00:36:14,297 - I called you scared. - Yeah. 985 00:36:14,422 --> 00:36:15,715 - And hurt. - Yeah. I know. 986 00:36:15,840 --> 00:36:18,051 I'm not worth two hours in a coach seat? 987 00:36:18,176 --> 00:36:20,344 - You know. All right, I'm gonna be... - What? 988 00:36:20,469 --> 00:36:22,639 - I'll just be straight with you, okay? - Yeah. That'd be great. 989 00:36:22,764 --> 00:36:24,891 - I've been honest with you up until now. - Yes. 990 00:36:25,016 --> 00:36:27,393 - So I'm gonna be honest with you again. - Go for it. 991 00:36:29,062 --> 00:36:31,314 I have a bleeding rectum. 992 00:36:32,649 --> 00:36:34,401 They're okay with you bleeding 993 00:36:34,526 --> 00:36:35,985 out of your rectum in first class? 994 00:36:36,111 --> 00:36:39,197 It's a more comfortable place to bleed. 995 00:36:39,322 --> 00:36:41,950 I think it's probably best that you go. 996 00:36:42,075 --> 00:36:43,660 - What? - Yeah. Leave the flowers, 997 00:36:43,785 --> 00:36:45,954 but take the ugly balloon, and just go. 998 00:36:46,996 --> 00:36:48,206 Okay. 999 00:36:50,291 --> 00:36:53,253 - Hey. You gonna eat that Jell-O? - I'm not gonna eat the Jell-O. 1000 00:36:54,254 --> 00:36:55,463 Hmm.